An strange feelings came to me watching fellows way back about fourteen years ago. Comparison of what both us achieved seems to be a big issue at all. I thought I reached far what everyone almost dreaming but with her I guess mine was too little.
Believe me I am not a bitter person. I always believe that what I have is just enough for my needs and the Lord loves me by being like this. But there are some times “ifs” passing my mind; how if I did not let myself be married to my ex-husband despite of being pregnant, how if I graduated my masteral degree if my father did not passed away the time I should had march on-stage, how if I did not broke my marriage and continue my prestige as school director of one international school? There are more than fingers count “ifs” and questions that at the end of the day I answers back. If I did not chose to be a wife of my husband then I have only one and illegitimate child and my husband might take legal action or underwent paternity testing, I may not be as happy as I am now. If my dad did not passed away I maybe graduated my master degree and teaching somewhere with my kids living far from me, and maybe I won’t experience being a school director and be a part of big organization which develop me into the fullest.
By analyzing my achievement and the all means of achieving those I see my edge over them. Sufferings thought me to become brave which serves as my power to dream to be on top! I may not be like my colleagues fourteen years ago in terms of financial freedom, I may not have complete family, but….. I am completely happy because I have kids, career, and confident that the Lord always besides me.